Where Are the Customers Yachts?

Submitted by Book Library on 23 March, 2010 - 23:13

This hilarious portrait of everyday Wall Street and its denizens rings as true today as it did when it was first published in 1940. Writing with a rare mixture of wry cynicism and bonhomie reminiscent of Mark Twain and H. L. Mencken, Fred Schwed, Jr., skewers everyone including himself in his brilliant send-ups of bankers, brokers, traders, investors, analysts, and hapless customers.

1955 edition of the 1940 investment classic. The title is derived from the old Wall Street joke about a visiting client who was receiving a tour of Wall Street. The guide pointed to the East River and said, There are the yachts of the powerful Wall Street Brokers," to which the gentleman replied, Where Are the Customers Yachts? Or, A Good Hard Look at Wall Street (A Marketplace Book)

"Once I picked it up I did not put it down until I finished. What Schwed has done is capture fully in deceptively clean language the lunacy at the heart of the investment business. From the Foreword by Michael Lewis, Bestselling author of Liar's Poker.

"How great to have a reissue of a hilarious classic that proves the more things change the more they stay the same. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent. Michael Bloomberg President, Bloomberg, LP one of the funniest books ever written about Wall Street. Jane Bryant Quinn, The Washington Post It's amazing how well Schwed's book is holding up after 55 years. About the only thing that's changed on Wall Street is that computers have replaced pencils and graph paper.

Otherwise, the basics are the same. The investor's need to believe somebody is matched by the financial advisor's need to make a nice living. If one of them has to be disappointed, it's bound to be the former. John Rothschild, Author, A Fool and His Money Financial Columnist, Time magazine.

Positive Review of Book

Sixty years old, and as accurate as ever. For everyone who thinks that technical analysis is gospel, for everyone who thinks high mutual fund fees are worth it, for everyone who complains that the "market makers" are manipulating the stock market, and most of all, for anyone who thinks that recent stock market events are unprecedented, you need this book! Schwed skewers classic Wall St archetypes that haven't changed a bit since 1940. It's a fun, funny read, and one I recommend highly, particularly to the Foolish.

Negative Review of Book

I forgot I even bought this book. Usually I love finance books. I take them on vacation and order several magazines. But this book has an introduction that promises how funny the book is. Then a couple more that promises how humorous the book is. And then some more chapters that i can't even remember Then I put it down out of boredom and don't know where it is.

Author Biography

Fred Schwed, Jr., was a professional trader who had the good sense to get out after losing a bundle (of mostly his own money) in the 1929 crash. Some years later, he published a children's book titled Wacky, the Small Boy. Wacky became a bestseller, and Schwed went on to draw further on his experience in writing Where Are the Customers' Yachts? His publisher said of him, "Mr. Schwed has attended Lawrenceville and Princeton and has spent the last ten years on Wall Street. As a result, he knows everything there is to know about children."

Table of Contents

  • Financiers and Seers.
  • Customers--That Hardy Breed.
  • Investment Trusts--Promises and Performance.
  • The Short Seller--He of the Black Heart.
  • Puts, Calls, Straddles, and Gabble.
  • The ``Good'' Old Days and the ``Great'' Captains.
  • Investment--Many Questions and a Few Answers.
  • Reform--Some Yeas and Nays.

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